Your child 5-11 years

Values ​​transmission: what do parents think?


What do you want for your children? The best, of course! But beyond emotional balance and material well-being, what values ​​do you want to convey so that they become "great" of whom you are proud? The point with Philippe Jeammet, child psychiatrist.

The respect

  • Why is it important today? Respect is a value that is often found at the top of investigations. The importance given to it indicates that you may be aware of a drift ... Respect the other, be polite, it does not necessarily go without saying!
  • How is it transmitted? "In order for the child to respect the other, it is necessary to impose limits on him," insists Philippe Jeammet, "this notion is paramount in education." Learning to respect also means that adults themselves are very respectful of the child. "Yes, we are their model! Say "goodbye", "thank you", "please", "excuse me" when you jostle someone, learn to wait, do not interrupt others, do not impose your ideas by force ... Courtesy, this can not be learned in a day!
  • Why is it stuck? "How do you explain to him that he should not be beaten when he's being shoved by a little friend?" Wonders Quentin's mother, worried like many parents. "The absence of limits given by some parents leads to an escalation of violence that can be seen in the nursery school," notes the child psychiatrist. Better to be clear with the values ​​that you want to transmit. Respect the other, it starts at home and in family: say "thank you" and "please", knock before entering the bathroom, leave the chair comfortable to grandmother ... it's valid for parents too! Otherwise your child may quickly find your contradictions.

Generosity

  • Why is it important today? "I want him to discover pleasures that are not necessarily related to consumption.I would like my son likes to give as much as receive." Like Lylou's mom, many of you think that it is important to counteract the "all consumption" with less mercantile values ​​...
  • How is it transmitted? "The child is fed by the behaviors of those around him, including parents, and imbued with what was given to them by their own parents," says our specialist. We transmit what we are, more or less consciously. Your child asks you why you are not giving anything to the gentleman? You can explain to him that for this gentleman, the worst thing is that no one is looking at him. "Do you want us to bring him a bottle of water or a sandwich?" You can also encourage your child to regularly sort through the toys he or she no longer uses, or in their clothes that are too small to give them association charity.
  • Why is it stuck? Whether it is generosity or any other value, part of the transmission escapes you. And between the noble values ​​you want to pass and your behavior, there is sometimes a gap! You keep telling Mathéo that you have to be generous, but you scold him because he shared his snack at recess? He may not be fooled by your beautiful speeches! It's up to you to explain the subtlety between the beauty of a generous gesture and the need not to be plucked!

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